TALLAHASSEE LASSIE

1. . . .That's what I think of everytime a news report comes on from down in one of those Florida precincts.  Freddy (Boom Boom) Cannon sang it back in 1959.
2. NOTICED:Gore legal strategist David Boies had on a pin-striped shirt opened at the collar for Tim Russert's Meet the Press, but when he appeared on Sam & Cokie's This Week program, he had on the same shirt but done up with a tie. Which show did he do first? Was he sweating more for Russert?
3. Does Dick Armey sit on a tanning bed?
4. People used to say, "To make a long story short." Now they just say, "Long story short." Everything is shorter.
5. SICK OF HEARING ABOUT . . .Actors who do their own stunts. The latest is Angelina Jolie, Billy Bob's wife. The one with the lips. She's doing them in Tomb Raiders.
6. . . . Isn't she an actress?
7. WTOP Radio in DC called the pandas "Washington's new first couple."
8. Don Imus, talking about the election coverage, thinks the MSNBC reporters are "hygienically cleaner looking" than all the other TV types. Well, it's his observation.
9. The New York Post has a Business section feature called "Dead dot com of the day" and the graphic used is a broken computer screen tossed in a trash can.
10. CHOCKFULL MAG: Ted Koppel's sitting on his new BMW 1000 motorcycle his wife gave him for his 60th birthday in an article in the January-February issue of AARP's Modern Maturity magazine. Shirley MacLaine's on the cover and James Brolin's in an ad for Flex-A-Min saying, "Achy joints? I don't have time for 'em."
11. How many ads are we gonna see for weatherman Doug Hill on Channel 7? Three in one break the other night. I guess they're finished with Jeff Gilbert. Where is he?
12. John Hockenberry must've gone back home to NBC from ABC. Saw him on Dateline the other night. Crime story he did. Good. And he did his standupper/sitdowner in his wheelchair which he wheeled right up to the camera while he was talking.
13. So Ben Affleck's dating Jerry Seinfeld's ex-Shoshanna Lonstein. Doesn't she make bras for a living?
14. Tom Hanks had a full bushy beard for his ABC special, Shooting War. It was weird at first, but you got used to it. The show seemed very old-style TV documentary, which was okay for a change. Nice seeing a show on without all the usual bells and whistles.
15. . . . I guess Tom did that while he was shooting Cast Away, that movie where he gets marooned on an island alone and looks all grizzled up. (Isn't castaway one word?)
16. BY THE WAY . . . People are complaining about the previews for Cast Away because they show him back with his wife. Feel cheated. Giving away the ending.
17. Somebody oughta tell those Hollywood types that you don't have to show everything in a movie preview, er ... trailer, as they seem to call them now. Gimme a Break!
18. A friend of mine called this "The Energizer Bunny Election. It keeps going and going and ..." True, huh?
19. HIT MAN. Now Hit Woman. They've got one out in Upper Marlboro, Maryland. Some bail bondsman allegedly hired one to kill his wife. Things're dangerous out there.
20. Singer Erykah Badu's wearing more elegant-looking headdresses lately. More than just wraps.
21. All they do on the CBS Early Show is cook. And nobody's ever outside for the weatherman either.
22. Are Hillary's pant suits over?
23. Is The Gap now just called Gap? The ads indicate it.
24. MISSING: Those last four signature notes at the end of ABC's World News Tonight theme. They used to tie it up. "Button" as they say in the broadcast biz. Seems incomplete.
25. Campbell's Soup seems to be counter-attacking Progresso's soup. Now they're advertising "Ready to Eat" soup like the competition. Don't have to add water like we used to. And is it me or what? The "M'm M'm Good" used to have more "M's" in it, didn't it?
26. Somebody said Calista Flockhart (Ally McBeal) looked like a skeleton with lips.
27. Meg Ryan said Russel Crowe was a "profound actor." (Still enamored. It'll wear off.)
28. Christine Aguilera's What A Girl Wants song is heard in the preview for the Mel Gibson/Helen Hunt movie What Women Want.
29. The Doo Wop special PBS has been running is really good. Most of the old reunited groups sound terrific. CASE IN POINT: The Chiffons. They sang One Fine Day and sounded great. And many others did too. Too bad you have to sit through the hosts hawking pledge money between the sets.
30. WATCH OUT GIRLS! The latest Viagra ad song goes: "I'm ready and I hope you're ready for me."
31. REMEMBERED: The St. Elmo's Fire (Man In Motion) Theme. John Parr did it for the 1985 movie. Nice.
32. Chili's has taken the bones out of their buffalo wings.
33. Looks like Colin Powell may finally get a job.
34. FACT: Shirley Temple made eight movies in 1934. They must've worked her little fanny off.
35. NBC/MSNBC's Chief Legal Correspondent Dan Abrams needs to trim the sideburns a little and slack off on the hair dye. Sometimes resembles Dracula.
36. Carnie Wilson posed nude for PETA.
37. Santa needs Preparation H Cooling Gel because he has to sit so long.
38. LISTENING TO . . . Kristine W's new album, Stronger. Soulful dance music. Hopefully she'll gain a wider audience with this one. She deserves it.
39. Does Macy Gray sound constipated when she sings? Someone said that.
40. UH . . . "The Court's in session. The Court's in session, now Here Comes The Judge"-Shorty Long on Soul from 1968.
    
    
    

    rocci@roccifisch.com

    
    

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