TO BIN LADEN:

1. As Good Witch Glinda in the Wizard of Oz would say, "Come out, come out, wherever you are ..."
2. That new baby elephant at Washington's National Zoo's now got a name: Kandula, for the famous elephant of the same name that carried an ancient Sri Lankan king to victory in many battles in the second century B.C., reports The Washington Post.
3. A DOG, A CAT AND A MOUSE. Booger, Kittie and Mousie. The cat's riding on top of the dog and the mouse is on the back of the cat. No joke. They were walking around D.C. last week on a World Peace Tour with their owner who runs the Peaceful Kingdom Pets Foundation animal shelter out in New Mexico. A lion and lamb-type thing, apropos this Christmastime and with a war going on. You had to see it to believe it.
4. George Harrison's 1971 hit song, My Sweet Lord, will be re-released in the U.K. and U.S. next month (Jan. 14, Jan. 15) as a tribute to the former Beatle and will benefit an as yet unnamed charity. The single will be backed by Let It Down as well as a 2000 version of Lord, taken from the re-release of his All Things Must Pass album.
5. Release, re-release ... I'm getting dizzy.
6. "Hare Krishna ..."
7. Former BET anchor Tavis Smiley did a good piece on Will Smith and his upcoming Ali movie for ABC's PrimeTime show last week. They called him special correspondent. It looked like he and Will got along well. Good interview segments.
8. Former ABC News correspondent Andrea McCarren is a good fit on News7's Good Morning Washington. A natural and a seasoned network and local reporter. She's post-Carol Costello, who went to CNN Headline News.
9. Elton John is gonna be the new face of M.A.C. cosmetics and he and Mary J. Blige and Shirley Manson of Garbage will be selling Viva Glam IV lipstick. Proceeds will go to an AIDS fund of the company plus John's AIDS foundation.
10. . . . Is he gonna wear it?
11. A woman whose husband is a police officer mentioned on a washingtonpost.com Internet discussion last week about tourists that he didn't mind giving directions, "except to the idiots out there. He's had people ask for directions while he was in the middle of an arrest."
12. . . . "Excuse me, but before you handcuff that man, could you tell me how to get to the Washington monument?" Ha Ha Ha.
13. OCEAN'S ELEVEN. Okay, not great. Watch it come and go. And some people are saying Julia Roberts is awful. (I did notice she doesn't have a very ladylike walk. It's more of a clump.)
14. Eleven does have a decent soundtrack. It's got that funky, loungy, jazzy, capery kind of retro music going on.
15. VANILLA SKY: A bit confusing I'd say. A definite Tom Cruise vehicle. It's another one of those movies with a catch to it. And the soundtrack intrudes a bit. And Penelope ... Fuhgedaboudit.
16. I DON"T REMEMBER. The movie poster for Ali says, "Forget what you think you know" and the soundtrack for Vanilla Sky says, "Forget everything you know about a soundtrack."
17. MSNBC's given Dan Abrams his own show now called The Abrams Report. He seems like he wants to be another Bill O'Reilly. God forbid!
18. Lou Dobbs's got some good looking poinsettias on his Moneyline set. Not just the standard red but the cream-colored ones too. Looks beautiful. And ABC's This Week's all decked out too.
19. How big is that metal container that John Walker's being held in over in Afghanistan? Doesn't sound too homey. (He reminds me of Cat Stevens.)
20. How come the Brits pronounce lieutenant leftenant?
21. Mariah Carey looked happy being held up by the soldiers in Kosovo where she was visiting the troops. She dressed like them, donning the fatigues. But one difference: Hers showed cleavage.
22. If I see Elton John in a polkadot suit one more time ... (His Got milk ads)
23. Like Condoleezza Rice's new hairdo?
24. RIDICULOUS. Tom Cruise in Vanity Fair, article titled The Naked Truth. Shirtless on the front and inside. And one of the inside photos shows him looking like he's showing off his underarm hair. What are these people thinking of?
25. Tom likes going shirtless. He does it in the movies (Vanilla Sky) and in real life. He's taut. No body fat detected.
26. THE NEW BORA: Tora.
27. A friend of mine got pulled over in New York for being on his cell phone and the ticket was $100. And the reason why the police didn't give him a warning was because he didn't hang up when they first spotted him. He continued talking and they thought it was disrespectful when he knew he was being pulled over. Spiteful.
28. OOPS. Now John Seigenthaler of MSNBC's hair looks a tad like it's getting lighter. Another one bites the dust.
29. Somebody said Ocean's Eleven was a "shoulder shrugger."
30. The Enquirer says thatBrat Pitt's always eating in Ocean's because he was/is? quitting smoking and needed something to do. He is always munching in it.
31. Liza Minnelli's fiance's a fan of plastic surgery and has had his nose done.
32. John Travolta doesn't look that good with a crewcut. Accents his heaviness.
33. Penelope Cruz says her shoes affect her acting in "powerful ways." She says they have to be right for the character she plays and that they can affect her way of working and how she sees things. Okay.
34. "If we don't go to an hour, the terrorists win," said CBS's Face the Nation anchor Bob Schieffer, kidding with CBS president Les Moonves about hoping to expand his Sunday morning talk show.
35. Comb the cave.
36. Sheik Yer Booty.
37. John Walker looks like he's been made up by Hollywood for some man roamed the earth prehistoric movie-type thing.
38. NEW RECURRING CHARACTER: Little Ricky. He asks, "Cheese-its or Cheese Nips?" Which is it?
39. They better have a video camera on bin Laden when they catch him.
40. I want a videophone for Christmas. Think you can manage that?
41. Who was John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt?
42. A LITTLE CONFUSED? Mr. Big Stuff asked me if I was going to see that new 7-11 movie. (He meant Ocean's Eleven.)
43. Best Buy says "Tech the Halls" for Christmas.
44. The yard birds are talking about the new Windex that has vinegar in it.
45. UH . . . For Your Love - The Yardbirds on Epic. 1965. (That long ago?)

rocci@roccifisch.com

Archives