February 4, 2013

 

BEYONCE: “I WILL ABSOLUTELY BE SINGING LIVE.”

  1. . . . That was her promise for the Super Bowl, in contrast to what she did at the inauguration.  I guess she fulfilled it.
  2. . . . In order to ensure standards and practices I was gonna suggest sending Brian Ross and his ABC investigative team down there to New Orleans to monitor the proceedings, to make sure she wouldn’t cheat again?
  3. “ . . . It’s what I was born to do, what I was born for,” Ms. Knowles-Carter (married to Jay-Z, aka Shawn Carter) affirmed at a news conference last Thursday where she actually sang the national anthem “live” for demonstration purposes for the assembled press.
  4. . . . “I’ve had a sixteen-year career and all of the things I’ve done have prepared me for this.  I’m ready.”
  5. . . . Boy, she’s worked her whole life just for this.
  6. . . . Since she was a baby she wanted to sing at the Super Bowl.
  7. . . . What a goal!
  8. . . . Such focus.
  9. . . . Get a life.
  10. . . . So the Bowl came and went and so did Beyonce and all her gyrating consorts, whiplashing over the stage with hair and “fire” and abandon.
  11. . . . She did a medley.
  12. . . . It’s all spectacle now.   How much more ‘to the hilt’ can it be done?
  13. . . . Her buddies from Destiny’s Child joined her on stage but the focus was still her.
  14. . . . Some reunion.
  15. . . . A friend of mine said she seemed to toss them off like a used Kleenex when she was done.
  16. . . . That last song she sang, “Halo” . . . Are there any more words to it than “halo”?
  17. . . . At performance’s end she stood up soaked in the adoration.
  18. . . . BACKING UP . . . Alicia Keys sang the national anthem this time.
  19. . . . It was dragged out.
  20. . . . She sat at a piano, which seemed somewhat inappropriate for the occasion. 
  21. . . . Some writers called her rendering “loungey.”
  22. . . . This is the national anthem.  Show some respect and stand up.
  23. . . . She never opened her eyes.
  24. . . . She didn’t hit the high notes very well.
  25. . . . It wasn’t a highlight.
  26. . . . She won’t go down in history.  
  27. “What are you gonna sing?” asked “American Idol” judge Keith Urban, whose biceps were busting out of his tight, rolled-up, short-sleeved Western-style shirt.
  28. . . . “Who’s Lovin’ You by Michael Jackson,” answered the hopeful
  29. . . . FACT:  To be completely correct it was originally done (and written) by (Smokey Robinson and) The Miracles back in 1960, the flipside of “Shop Around,” Motown’s (Tamla Records) first million-selling single.
  30. . . . “What are you gonna sing?” another celebrity judge asked another willing contestant.
  31. . . . “’Something’s Got a Hold On Me’ by Christina Aguilera,” said the aspirant.
  32. . . . FACT:  That song was originally done by Etta James (1962, on Argo Records).
  33. . . . It’s a younger generation now.  They know the remakes.  I remember the originals.
  34. . . . They know what they know and I know what I know and never the twain shall meet, I guess.    
  35. . . .  I’m the old grand pappy.
  36. . . . SIDENOTE.  “American Idol” has seen better days.  Now it’s all snark and dumb judge personalities.
  37. . . . The show has – excuse the expression – “jumped the shark” (when a TV show declines in quality), if you ask me.
  38. Hillary Clinton has no office to go to, nothing on her schedule now that she’s leaving as secretary of state, and re-entering private life.
  39. . . . Why not bake some cookies? (Just kidding)
  40. MOVIE:  “Les Miserables.”  Big movie musical.  Takes a while to get into but I finally came around to it.
  41. . . . They obviously cast for star power and not for voices:  Hugh Jackman’s voice was not that appealing and Russell Crowe’s was a cut above amateur.  Anne Hathaway was pretty good but God did she squeeze every drop out of that “I Dreamed a Dream” song – the one Susan Boyle did on “Britain’s Got Talent” back in ’09.
  42. . . . An associate of mine – how snobby does that sound? -- said the movie was a “lost possibility” – that the director/producers didn’t succeed in converting a hit stage play into an equally “successful” – it’s done pretty well in box office -- movie.  
  43. . . . They missed an opportunity.
  44. . . . Plus the movie was almost unenduringly long.  I was totally blitzed when I walked out of that theater.
  45. Former CNN meteorologist Rob Marciano is now co-host (with Nancy O’Dell) of “Entertainment Tonight.”
  46. . . . He succeeds Mark Steines, the former longtime co-host who did the show with Mary Hart until she left and was replaced by O’Dell. 
  47. . . . He’s still feeling his way and trying to keep up but is very overshadowed by the aggressive O’Dell, who obviously rules the roost and monopolizes the broadcast.
  48. . . . He’s learning to smile a lot and stare right into the camera.  That’s what TV personalities do now – keep that smile going while the camera’s on you and keeping it plastered on until they cut to something else. 
  49. . . . Let that smile define you; don’t ever let it die.
  50. . . . Make everyone who watches you believe that you were born smiling and you’ll die smiling.
  51. . . . Smile ‘til your jaws ache, for crissakes.
  52. . . . (“Smile” – Tony Bennett, 1959, on Columbia Records.)
  53. ONE LAST THOUGHT.  Joe Biden’s son Beau was right behind Beyonce when she “sang” the national anthem at the inauguration.
  54. . . . Couldn’t he tell if she was lip syncing?
  55. . . . Why didn’t anybody ask him if he knew about it?
  56. MOVIE:  “Zero Dark Thirty.”  Really good film that dramatizes the hunt for Osama bin Laden. 
  57. . . . Jessica Chastain stars as Maya, a CIA agent who’s been after him for 10 years.
  58. . . . It’s on her educated hunch that the Navy Seals undertake the mission to storm his Abbottabad compound in Pakistan.
  59. . . . They show waterboarding and other types of torture but it’s not the worst thing that’s ever been depicted on screen – just look at all those slasher movies.
  60. . . . Kathryn Bigelow directs this movie in the same believable, unexaggerated way she did “The Hurt Locker.”
  61. . . . By the way, “Zero Dark Thirty” is, according to Bigelow, “a military term for 30 minutes after midnight, andit refers also to the darkness and secrecy that cloaked the entire decade-long mission.”
  62. NBC’s Kristen Welker said this in her report about the Obama daughters (Sasha and Malia) at the inauguration:  “It’s impossible not to ‘marvel’ about how much they’ve grown.”
  63. . . . Good God, so what?  It’s been four years; kids grow up.  What’s to marvel about?
  64. . . . UH . . . “Why Do Kids Grow Up” – Randy & The Rainbows – the guys that did “Denise” – on Rust Records, 1964.


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