DON’T LIKE THE 30% LARGER TIC-TACS

1. . . . . They’re fatter and take up too much room in my pocket. They ruin my streamlined look. Appearance is everything, you know.
2. A female friend of mine was asking about Levitra, another one of those erectile dysfunction pills. "Is that like levitate," she queried. Ha Ha Ha.
3. ABC7 anchorman Leon Harris said he heard cicadas made good fishing bait. So go out and catch some, for crissakes.
4. The Today show is calling its upcoming summer concert series, Plazapalooza since they do them in Rockefeller Plaza. Clever?
5. Boy, Dan Senor, the Coalition Provisional Authority spokesman in Iraq, sure makes himself available. He’s on the tube every time you turn around, explaining things. Seems like a go getter. Watch, his next job will be a consultant for one of the networks.
6. Mr. Big Stuff raises the often asked question, "What’s the difference between mostly sunny and mostly cloudy? Does mostly mean, say 51% and the other’s 49? And what about partly sunny and partly cloudy?"
7. FIELD GREENS. Yeah, I’ve had ‘em. You can throw a few in my salad but don’t make the whole thing consist that. Nothing to ‘em. They’re weightless. I feel like I’m eating locust tree leaves or something. Give me romaine and even iceburg any old day.
8. MORE HAIR? That’s what John Travolta looks like he’s got to me. It just seems he’s getting older but has more hair now. Natural looking though. Maybe it’s his. But it does make me wonder.
9. SAID IT BEFORE . . . But they’re still doing it on the Ellen show. When she dances, they need to show the audience more. Instead, the director stays on her while she does her moves and shows Tony, the DJ but not the audience members. That should be the whole deal - interacting with them.
10. Jade Jagger, Mick’s daughter, was on TV last week and was wearing a crucifix around her neck, the end of which was shaped into a dagger. A dagger for Jagger, I guess. Is that sacrilegious?
11. elimiDATE. The survival dating show, they call it. Sleazy, with a jerkhead host. Pop-Ups all over the place. It’s the most popped up show I’ve ever seen and they get pretty elaborate. And I like the bumper music going into the commercial breaks. It’s sorta bass-y and crunchy.
12. A friend of mine saw one of those new non-gas guzzling cars and asked if it was a hybird. I had to correct her and say, "You mean hybrid."
13. It’s already Kentucky Derby time. Saturday at Churchill Downs, Louisville. Post time: 6:04 p.m. On NBC. SIDE NOTE: An HBO documentary, Jockey, which aired Monday night, told the other side of horse racing and it wasn’t pretty. Film explores the rigorous schedules the jockeys work and the dangerous side of the sport: purging so they don’t gain weight, lack of insurance coverage, generally low pay and more. Got good reviews. Will be rebroadcast.
14. So Bill Clinton’s book is to be called My Life. Boy, that title took a lot of imagination to come up with.
15. On The Swan, the announcer, in describing the plastic surgery one of the contestants was to undergo, said that the patient didn’t have calves and ankles, she had cankles. So they did some liposuction there to make a contoured transition. Or something.
16. Hanalie, dog in the neighborhood, is very upset - barking and crying because she has to be boarded while owner Sally gets the new house ready. Just two days though and then she’ll have more space to stretch out and chase the cats, Buddy and Emma.
17. SICK OF . . . Hearing about the end of Friends and seeing the cast all over TV and magazine articles crying about it. Get it over and be done with it. The last episodes haven’t been any good anyway.
18. Where does Bob Woodward get the energy? He was everywhere on TV last week plugging his Plan of Attack book about the Bush administration’s lead-up to the war in Iraq and he’s still doing interviews. Striking while the iron’s hot, I guess.
19. Mr. High Falutin found 13 Going On 30 "charming and heart-warming." And he said he thought Jennifer Garner is well on her way to becoming a huge star. Hallelujah. For once in his life he found something he liked.
20. Those Master Card commercials with Badger, the Boston terrier, really get to me. I think they’re running the second one now. Each one ends with a To be continued.
21. Prince acts prissy.
22. A picture caption in USA Today of Lucy Liu wearing pointy-toed shoes said that she was risking hammer toe and ingrown toenails by wearing the darn things.
23. Why is Entertainment Tonight’s Mary Hart wearing glasses now? She’s doing it this week. Studious look? For that show?
24. MEMORIAL. Today, for veteran ABC News correspondent Jack Smith who died April 7 of cancer. Service was at the Old Post Chapel at Fort Myer in Virginia with burial at Arlington National Cemetery. He was a Vietnam veteran and nearly killed in 1965. He received a Bronze Star and Purple Heart. His son Alexander spoke for him, followed by Sen. Chuck Hagel, Sam Donaldson, Ted Koppel, Peter Jennings and others. Jack covered stories and events all over the world for ABC and was "Our man, Jack Smith" for nine years to David Brinkley who always introduced him that way for his background piece about whatever topic that Sunday’s show was exploring. He was the son of legendary newsman Howard K. Smith (CBS, ABC) and had the exact same voice as his father.
25. Will M. Night Shyamalan’s new movie, The Village, be as much of a cheat as Signs was? They never showed you anything in that.
26. Michael Jackson gets arraigned on Friday. His people are busing supporters to the courthouse but they’re supposedly low-keying it this time. So maybe no more dancing on the roof of a car.
27. UH . . . Dancing Machine - The Jackson 5 on Motown. 1974. ‘member that?

rocci@roccifisch.com

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