LINDA TRIPP ALL DOLLED UP

1. . . . Yeah, that was her on This Week With Sam Donaldson & Cokie Roberts yesterday. Looked very professional, but she seemed nervous. Pleased with herself though. And it seemed she kept looking up at probably the monitor which had her picture on it, to marvel at her latest makeover.
2. Linda Tripp/Monica Lewinsky . . . Who's lying?
3. My mother didn't watch the Barbara Walters interview because she would've felt like slapping Monica right across the face. (Through the TV set?)
4. Whoopi Goldberg says her hosting this year's Academy Awards is "really historic because it's the last one of the century." So what? Is life as we know it gonna end when the clock ticks 2000? People're acting like there's no tomorrow after the year turns.
5. . . . The millennium makes me think of Milli, as in Vanilli. Ha Ha Ha.
6. TOM SELLECK: "I'm the NRA."
7. ANNOYING NEW THING. When you call somebody now at a business' main number, before they connect you to the extension, a recording comes on saying, "In the future, you may dial directly ... " and they give the number and then connect the caller. So, I guess, the operator doesn't have to do it. I'd like to know what operators do do?
8. Do we have to say George W. Bush everytime we use his name? We know he's not his father.
9. WHO'S THE NEW SISKEL? People doubt it'll be Tom Shales because he and Ebert look too much alike. (Not so true now, since Roger lost all that weight.)
10. Did Monica ask Connie Chung for a job? Thought I heard that somewhere.
11. FORESKIN NEWS AGAIN: USA TODAY reports doctors are using it along with cow collagen to grow skin to treat "everything from chronic skin ulcers to severe burns." With circumcision popularity decreasing, what're they gonna do?
12. Let Bay Buchanan be brother Pat's presidential running mate. She'd have to take a leave of absence from TV too.
13. Is there another Juanita?
14. Those books Clinton bought out in Utah last week and couldn't charge because his Amex card expired must've been cheap. (Paperback?) Four books for $62.66? Such a deal.
15. . . . And should that store clerk have told the press exactly which books the Prez bought? (None of anybody's business.)
16. THE GREASEMAN: A dead man. (His mouth ran away from him.)
17. The most downloaded woman on the internet "has no idea what a download is." That makes sense.
18. CHILDISH QUOTE: "I'm in scaredy cat awe of how he makes movies." Tom Hanks on Steven Spielberg. (How about cutting down on the enamored factor a little bit?)
19. Movie prices are sneaking up. Some would say jacking up.
20. Is Nancy O'Dell of Access Hollywood really considered a correspondent? TV Guide calls her that. She's in a low-cut bodice-type thing that pushes her up. Is that what correspondents wear?
21. . . . Giselle Fernandez started that blatant sexpot stuff for female anchors.
22. Shameless. That's what the world's become.
23. LISTENING TO . . . Dusty Springfield's newly-released Dusty In London album, called the Lost British Recordings. Many never heard before on this side of the Atlantic. Great find. On Rhino.
24. . . . Her voice – Totally Unique. She was what they'd call blue-eyed soul back in the 60s, like the Righteous Brothers. She brought many American soul singers to London and often was the only white person on the roster, proving she could keep up with the best. Her heart was in it.
25. GIDGET. That's the real name of the Taco Bell chihuahua, and it's a she. And now there's gonna be a movie, but Gidget won't be in it. Another dog will. Taco Bell just wants her for themselves.
26. What does Lauryn Hill's Miseducation album title mean?
27. ON DIFFERENT SIDES. Monica's hair parts are. On the left for Barbara Walters and on the right for Andrew Morton's book. She's changeable.
28. Who is J.D. Power & Associates? Are they like Good Housekeeping?
29. They're on strike at the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. Technicians and now writers.
30. Denise Richards – who's she? – has her hands over her breasts on the cover of the current Details magazine. Some say they're not hers (the latter); that they look out of proportion to her body. Somebody wanna check that?
31. Did Country singer George Jones get in a car accident because he was talking on his cell phone? It's not clear to me.
32. "You can only wear one pair of shoes at a time," said Oprah Winfrey, talking about not wanting more in life.
33. MISSPELL. In the last Random. Juliette Lewis is spelled this way. Sorry. She's in The Other Sister movie that's out now, playing mentally challenged. Some say there's something wrong with that. May be. The film's pretty good, but there's a question about intentions, and maybe the movie shouldn't have been made in the first place. Up for debate.
34. Now they're gonna do The King & I animated. Barbra Streisand's got something to do with it.
35. . . . It seems the only reason they do these animated films is for a pop star soundtrack.
36. Ben Affleck's laughable as a bartender in the youth film, 200 Cigarettes. Tom Cruise was much better in Cocktail.
37. Now they're saying cigars should have warnings, something like cigarettes. Well that's about time. They don't deserve all the good PR they've been getting.
38. I don't remember Milkfuls.
39. SELL THOSE MAGS. JFK Jr.'s George magazine seems to bait people to say controversial things that are quoted. Latest was former White House Press Secretary Mike McCurry saying that Chelsea Clinton "has her head screwed on a little bit better than her mom and dad." What prompted him to say that?
40. They're singing stain to the tune of Fame in those Maytag commercials. Funny.
41. UH . . . Fame – Irene Cara, on RSO from 1980. Whatever happened to her?

rocci@roccifisch.com

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